Joy

Sweet pea

It seems that I forget to allow joy into my life.  Oh, it’s not that it’s not there.  I am just very quick to nod at it and dismiss it.  I move on to the next thing that needs to be done rather than allowing myself a moment to experience pleasure.

I came to this rather surprising insight while talking with a health coach.  We were talking about exercise.  She was hoping I’d find something I really like to do.  I told her that historically, as soon as I find something I actually like to do I stop doing it.  Something else takes precedence, especially if I might be having fun.

I also mentioned that even when good things happen to me I am reluctant to take the time to gloat.  Isn’t that an interesting word choice?  If I celebrate, delight in the moment, allow myself to experience joy the voice in my head accuses me of gloating.  Unpacking the old baggage is a significant part of the work of exploring spirituality, but sometimes it feels like reaching blind into a bag of mousetraps!

hibiscus

Dare I admit that if it wasn’t for my dear friend Kate (THANK YOU!) I probably wouldn’t have even celebrated having my book accepted at the publishers?  It’s true.  She called me up beaming for me.  She had a beer in her hand and insisted I get myself a drink and toast across the phone lines.  She gave me permission to actually take some time and bask in the moment.  Yes, as stunned and pleased as I was I needed permission to be joyful.

So now I have taken up a daily practice of actually looking for things that bring me joy.  I find myself singing along more to the radio.  I find myself turning off the TV and reading a trashy novel.  I find myself thinking about flowers.

I used to fill my house with flowers.  Every month I’d spend money at the florists for an armload of blossoms.  I’d fill in with flowers from the garden or my blossoming plants.  I know I stopped the florist because of the budget, but when did I stop bringing flowers in from outside?

chives

Every time my hibiscus blooms it makes me smile.  It’s like a present for the day.  I delight in walking past the flower displays at the grocery store.  I even enjoy the little flowers at the top of my chives.  So I’m going out to the grocery store and getting myself a bouquet along with my milk and eggs.  I deserve all the joy I can get!

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About lisaspiral

I've been writing and speaking about spirituality to small groups for years and am looking to expand my horizons. Hopefully this blog will inspire you to expand yours as well.

Posted on May 21, 2012, in Bio, grattitude, spiritual and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 7 Comments.

  1. Thanks for reminding me that you never know which of your actions is going to make a huge difference in someone else’s life, so make them good ones.

  2. Hooray for Kate for helping your celebrate! I LOVE it! I’d celebrate with you for sure. That’s a great accomplishment. I do remember how you kind of mentioned that acceptance in passing your blog and moved on to focus on the arduous task of editing. Great that you are beginning to relish joy! You not only deserve joy, you deserve to enjoy joy–or “gloat”–to use your word.
    Hugs,
    Kathy

  3. We are such complex human beings sometimes, aren’t we? To think we can even convince ourselves not to feel joy! I have heard (and sensed at times) that truly, at the center, we ARE joy. We only cover up that joy (and peace) with layers of expection, judgement, thoughts, beliefs. Right now I am thinking of you and sitting with the joy that you–we–are.

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