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Breathe

Dad is home and doing well.  Thank you for all the support and good wishes.

The bees are liking the bee balm

The bees are liking the bee balm

I have allergies.  I’ve been doing allergy shots for 5 years or so.  Things are definitely better, but there are still a few weeks each year where I have to pull out all the stops.  This is one of those weeks.  Because of that, sitting in an air-conditioned hospital was not the most horrible thing for me to be doing.

I’ve missed some pretty dramatic thunderstorms these past weeks.  Either I’ve slept so hard I didn’t hear them or, like the night the tornado sirens went off, the worst has passed me by.  I’ve been grateful not to need to water the garden as I run out the door in the morning.

The lawn hasn’t been mowed, but the truth of the matter is that given the allergy conditions I probably wouldn’t be able to do it anyway.  I often quip that breathing is over-rated, but the truth is I’m kind of attached to it.

On a good day I can hit the top.  On a bad day…….

On a good day I can hit the top. On a bad day…….

I’ve been watching Dad work the spirometer post surgery.   He’s a champ.  So the other day I got out mine, “just to check”.  When your 79-year-old father whose just had open heart surgery literally blows harder it’s definitely time to hit the inhaler.  I had to work hard to get my numbers above the “you should really consider taking yourself to the emergency room” line.

Despite the allergies, being back to our “normal” routine feels like taking a deep breath.  The list of things I’ve “put off tending to” is long, but doable.  Orion and I went to the movies this weekend (so I could avoid making dinner as this theater comes with a menu.) which was fun for both of us.

Dinner and a movie.  We saw Pitch Perfect 2

Dinner and a movie. We saw Pitch Perfect 2

Now it’s Monday.  Rather than grumble I’ll be grateful for a new week to start.  I’ll be grateful for the summer weather and flowers that are pretty even through the window.  I’ll be grateful that my family is all where they belong and doing well. And I’ll remember to breathe.

A Big Wrench

800px-MonkeyWrenchAs Burns said (after his language was updated) “The best laid plans of mice and men often go astray.”    According to Murphy, “Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.”   One way or the other, as the idiom goes, “someone has thrown a wrench in the works.”

I really wanted to spend last weekend in California at Pantheacon.  I was scheduled as a presenter and I was really excited about the workshop I planned.  It was about energy management, specifically in ritual settings, called “Sitting down or sitting out”.  Maybe the universe thought I needed a refresher course first!

It has been a busy month with lots of medical appointments.  My regular readers have heard me talk about dealing with a DVT (blood clot) and blood thinners and anemia.  Every single appointment I’ve had since the beginning of the year has started with the statement, “You need to know I’m getting on a plane February 13th.”

Orion taking me to the doctor.  That's the hospital in the background.

Orion taking me to the doctor. That’s the hospital in the background.

I didn’t get on the plane.  Instead I got scheduled for surgery.  In fact, if you’re reading this on President’s Day Monday, I’m certainly at the hospital and may be “under the knife” even now.  Scheduled publishing is one of those handy WordPress features.

The truth of the matter is that I’ve known for several weeks that surgery was the plan.  I just insisted that I get the California trip out of the way first.  In looking for ways to address the anemia I was referred to a Gynecologist who, as part of a standard exam, did a biopsy.  It turns out that I have endometrial cancer.

It’s been 24 years (to the MONTH!) since the last time someone told me I had cancer.  Back then it was colon cancer and I was relieved to get the news that being sick wasn’t just in my head.  There was a little bit of relief this time as well.  My first thought was that my PAP smear was off, and it was cervical cancer – which is really nasty.   Endometrial cancer tends to stay localized.  Most of the time it’s an easy fix.  Have a hysterectomy and you’re good to go.

Even the idea of a hysterectomy is kind of a relief.  I’ve been experiencing peri-menapausal symptoms for a very long time.  I have ZERO interest in more children.  I’m a lousy candidate, medically, for any kind of pregnancy.  Happy to be done with all of that.

In the ER getting fluids and told I can't go to California.  Trying to look on the bright side.

In the ER getting fluids and told I can’t go to California. Trying to look on the bright side.

The concern is that it’s a second occurrence of cancer.  The concern is that this cancer doesn’t explain the blood clot.  The concern is that maybe I’m one of those people who is prone to getting clots and cancers.  Unless you’re me, in which case the concern is missing the trip to Pantheacon.

I’m not a great candidate for surgery either.  This will be my (count them) sixth abdominal surgery.  The last one was the bariatric surgery less than a year ago.  The nutritional complications from both the bariatric surgery and the cancer can impact recovery time.  The scar tissue could prevent the procedure from being done laparoscopically – significantly impacting recovery.  The blood thinners and anemia add additional complications.

So please send warm thoughts and prayers for an easy surgery and rapid recovery.  I’ll add an update a little later in the week so you’ll know how I’m doing.   I may take a bit of a blogging break while I process all of this and try and get a handle on another version of “my new life.”

And if you’re interested in what I’m missing, here are links to the blogs I’ve written about Pantheacon and flying to California in years past.

https://lisaspiral.wordpress.com/2014/02/24/pantheacon-2014/https://lisaspiral.wordpress.com/2014/02/17/california-2/https://lisaspiral.wordpress.com/2013/02/18/california/

 

Home from the hospital.  Everything went really well.  They managed to do the surgery both laproscopically and robotically!  Got everything and no surprises.  Now it’s recovery.   I hurt and I’m really tired, but I’m glad to have that part behind me.  Thanks for the well wishes!

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